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After Abuse Allegations in Porn, Introduces Consent Documents

on Tuesday, 11 June 2019. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates


Shortly after the allegations against Deen, Kink announced that it would no longer be working with him. The company also updated its “model bill of rights” to emphasize consent and encourage reporting of non-consensual behavior. “That made us really look at, ‘What are the gray areas?’” said Stabile. “How can we tease this out more?” In the years since, Kink continued to develop its protocols as it went from producing porn to distributing content made by third-parties. “We didn’t want consent to be a competitive advantage that we had,” said Stabile of the decision to share its protocols.

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Medellin judge grants pension to polyamorous husbands

on Tuesday, 11 June 2019. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

Columbia Reports

"This is the first time in Colombia that two men have requested a shared survivor’s pension in a polyamorous relationship, but we’re not doing it for the money, as we are in work and don’t need it. We’re doing it for the dignity of our family, of which Alex always felt so proud."

19 06 10

National Sex Day Is 6/9 & Here's How To Celebrate

on Sunday, 09 June 2019. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates


"I think talking about sex with your friends can help normalize interests and behaviors and it can also spark your imagination," Sarah Watson, licensed professional counselor and sex therapist, tells Bustle. "Friends can encourage you to try new things and expand your horizons. In my experience, most people aren't educated on how to talk about sex so starting with your friends in a loving and safe environment can be very helpful!"

19 06 09

No taste for vanilla! When and why is pain pleasurable?

on Saturday, 08 June 2019. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

Medical News Journal

Another reason for engaging in rough play during sex is that of escapism. "Pain," explain authors of a review published in The Journal of Sex Research, "can focus attention on the present moment and away from abstract, high-level thought."

"In this way," the authors continue, "pain may facilitate a temporary reprieve or escape from the burdensome responsibilities of adulthood."

In fact, a study from 2015 found that many people who practiced BDSM reported that their erotic practices helped them de-stress and escape their daily routine and worries.

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Is An Open Relationship Over Summer Break A Good Idea? An Expert Weighs In

on Thursday, 06 June 2019. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

Elite Daily

What's OK for you? What's not OK for you? Would you feel some type of way if your partner cuddled after they had sex with their new partner? Are you allowed to post about your open relationship on social media? Can you sleep with friends? Coming up with a "Yes/No/Maybe" list — sexual acts or behaviors with your new partners that are a "yes," "no," or a "maybe" — can come in clutch. Schechinger also says that scheduling check-in times in advance can also be helpful.

19 06 06

How This Queer, Asian BDSM Practitioner Envisions The Future Of Pride

on Wednesday, 05 June 2019. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

Huffington Post

I feel like the younger queer generation ― whether they’re into kink or not ― are able to see [kink] without being horrified or like their identity is going to be repressed. I know there are so many people within the older generation of the LGBTQIA community who really didn’t want anything to do with the leather community. They really wanted to separate themselves from it to show they are family-oriented, to show they’re “normal” ― part of corporate America, which is how we got into the more corporate version of Pride. The generation that’s younger than me is embracing [kink/BDSM] and are much more likely to be activists in upholding an array of progressive idealisms.

19 06 05

Why it’s bizarre to try ban kinks and fetishes at Pride

on Thursday, 30 May 2019. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates


Although there are some sincere desires here for making Pride more inclusive, the whole thing carries an uncomfortable echo of less progressive arguments which crop up every year. Arguing against the presence of kink at Pride typifies the most pious, finger-wagging form of respectability politics. This usually goes along the lines of “well, it’s hardly giving a good impression to straight people if we’re seen to be cavorting around in latex, is it? We’re just playing into homophobe’s hands!” This is almost certainly true: I’m sure that homophobic people do find it infuriating to see, I’m sure it disgusts them… but imagine thinking this was a bad thing.

Sexual Satisfaction in BDSM

on Thursday, 30 May 2019. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

Yet again, dominant players in BDSM show a mental health advantage.

Psychology Today

It is worth noting that in the Italian study (Botta et al., 2019) that I have been discussing, both submissives and the control group scored in the normal range on the measures of sexual satisfaction and sexual problems compared to general population norms. Hence, the findings were not that these groups were particularly distressed compared to dominants, but rather that dominants were functioning unusually well. People who feel comfortable in the dominant role may have a higher sense of agency and self-confidence than those who prefer the submissive role, and even people more generally. This is consistent with my suggestion in a previous post that BDSM practitioners may prefer roles that suit their personalities rather than seeking compensatory roles that contrast with their usual personality. The finding that switches had higher sexual satisfaction than the control group is new in that a previous study that examined switches (Wismeijer & van Assen, 2013) did not find any particular advantage for switches in terms of subjective well-being or neuroticism, with dominants scoring better than all other groups in that study. Hence, it may be worth investigating if the versatility of the switch role is associated with any advantages in other populations of BDSM practitioners. Moreover, that people in an ownership/belonging relationship had higher sexual satisfaction than those who were not, especially when this was in the context of a committed romantic relationship, appears to be a new finding. Botta et al. suggested that people in such relationships might be freer from sexual stigma and benefit from heightened trust and emotional connection. It could also be that people enter into such an arrangement when they see it as a good fit to their personal psychosexual needs. This would be consistent with the increasingly accepted view that BDSM activities are not a pathological aberration or an expression of difficulties with normal sex, but simply an alternative that some people find attractive (Richters, Visser, Rissel, Grulich, & Smith, 2008).

19 05 30

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