So a few weeks ago, I wrote a piece about the Showtime reality show “Polyamory: Married and Dating” and, you know, had some fun with it. After all, it is a show about a bunch of people having sex with a bunch of people of other. Fun.
Anyway, little did I know that real polyamorous people — you know, those not having sex on camera for money — are, in large part, completely, 100 percent “in the closet.” Their families don’t know. Their employers don’t know. No one knows. Even two people on the Showtime show were closeted (at least until the show aired, duh).
Why? Because they’re fearful their families would shun them, their employers would fire them, everyone will look at them like sex-crazed fiends.
As it turns out …
“This lifestyle choice isn’t all hedonism and group sex,” one “poly” person told me via Facebook. “It’s mostly based on all the normal, mundane yet wonderful stuff you ‘monos’ experience on a daily basis (like) grocery shopping, TV, spats over who has to mow the lawn. I felt compelled to let you know that the ‘everyone sleeps with everyone’ style of polyamory depicted in the show is not indicative of every poly relationship out there.”
Another poly person echoes the point.
“It is like any other group dynamic,” she said. “OK, so that is over-simplifying it, but it is true.”
And both these people were adamant about staying anonymous.
“I myself am afraid to ‘come out’ as poly at my place of work for fear that someone’s small-minded judgement might cost me my job,” one said.
Same goes for the other person, who at first posted her thoughts on my Facebook page.
“I realized that it may cause problems where I work,” she said. “I have no problem answering any questions about it, but I work for the state and, well, you understand, I hope.”
The RCMP is investigating Brown's connection to the photos.
But the man said several officers — bearing a warrant that said the search was being carried out as part of an investigation into alleged defamatory libel — raided his home and seized several computers and cell phones.
The man said the officers told his wife that he was likely cheating on her because he had been lurking on the website where he found the photos of Brown.
"After assisting the RCMP regarding this matter we have been targeted by those in Organized Crime Section," the man wrote in a letter to CBC News. ...
DENVER (AP) - The Denver City Council is rejecting a $42,500 settlement with a swingers club over alleged use of excessive police force.
Lawyers for the Scarlet Ranch swingers club claim Denver police used unreasonable force during a May 2010 raid on the club.
According to the Denver Post, the suit filed last year claims at least 10 police officers raided the club without a warrant, injured one of the members and stole a videotape that had captured the raid on the club's surveillance system.
VANCOUVER -- Government and police watchdog groups are concerned a police raid at the home of a man connected with a whistle-blower Internet blog targeting RCMP corruption was politically motivated.
About a half-dozen officers, using a warrant for defamatory libel, seized several computers and cellphones from the man, who helped to set up the Re-Sergeance Alliance blog site. He also recently assisted the Mounties in finding online photos of Coquitlam, B.C., RCMP Cpl. Jim Brown engaged in graphic S&M activities.
Brown, who was involved in the investigation into serial killer pig farmer Robert Pickton, was cleared of wrongdoing by the force in 2010 before a new probe was ordered in July.
Michael Vonn, policy director for the B.C. Civil Liberties Association, said this type of warrant is rarely used.
“Almost invariably when it’s invoked, it’s a critic of the police,’’ Vonn said. “This should concern all Canadians.”
Police investigating a crime against themselves creates “a massive accountability deficit here.”
Lawyer Cameron Ward, who is representing the families of Pickton’s victims at the Missing Women Inquiry, is concerned officers involved in the raid were aware of his private discussions with the suspect.
“I’m concerned with whether the RCMP have been intercepting my communications and, more importantly, why such a response was deemed necessary,’’ Ward said. ...
She told Business Insider that her clients are predominately male and include celebrities, politicians, Fortune 500 leaders and Wall Streeters. She sees teachers, garbage men and musicians, too.
The finance guys tend to come see her on their lunch breaks, she said.
"I appreciate it because it's a very stressful job, I imagine, dealing with money and power meetings and closing deals," she said, adding, "And they come to me with that sort of stress and they just come to let it all go...I had guys call me after a session saying 'That was great. I feel like I can go back to work. I feel clear headed. I feel like I could be a good husband and father."
When Wall Streeters come to see her they don't have to worry about calling the shots and closing a deal, she said. ...
Local fetish promoter Jennifer Skrukwa, aka Jennifer Zurba and commonly known as Jennifer S. within the kink community and online, has been hit with two lawsuits in recent weeks.
The more serious of the two lawsuits was first reported on by the website CourthouseNews last week. Reporter Daryll Greer reported that Skrukwa is being sued for defamation in BC Supreme Court. The suit alleges that Skrukwa posted status updates on the website Fetlife.com in which she claimed a local man sexually and physically assaulted two women; claims, the suit alleges, Skrukwa knew to be false.
Greer immediately thought the case was significant. “That lawsuit was quite fascinating because I’m unaware of any other libel claims arising out of a status update on a social networking site,” Greer wrote in an email.
A Complicated Story
A post from the plaintiff in the case, “J,” alleges the trouble began for him as follows: “On July 31, 2012, Jennifer_S contacted me by telephone and advised me that she had given my real name and telephone number to the RCMP as part of the Cpl Brown investigation. She also called my partner and informed her of what she had done and asked her if we were married. (A very odd question.) When I asked her why she had released my details, she said it didn’t matter why, it was done and that was it. When I pressed her for further information, she hung up on me.”
An RCMP officer shared recently that to the best of his knowledge Skrukwa had not been in touch with the RCMP at that point. Why Skrukwa would indicate to J that she had been, and then refuse to make any statements about that is a source of speculation in the local kink community.
Through his lawyer, the complainant in the case declined to be interviewed by Erotic Vancouver. Those close to him have pointed out that Skrukwa’s allegations against him came only after he had spoken out against her, a tactic they say is common for her. ...
The lawyer who represents families of missing and murdered women at the Oppal Inquiry is demanding answers, after the home of a man who helped expose the online sexual activities of an RCMP officer was raided.
Cameron Ward wants to know why the RCMP is going to such lengths to carry out a seven member raid on a private residence.
Ward says he has been told the police repeatedly mentioned his name before removing the resident's computers, phones and other electronic equipment.
At the same time, the RCMP is warning its employees not to identify themselves as force members when posting personal comments on social media sites.
The new policy comes down only days after the search warrant was executed on the man who helped expose Corproal Jim Brown, but also assisted in posting a blog critical of the RCMP.