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"BDSM: Where dungeons can be sexy and pain is a good thing"

on Friday, 22 February 2013. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

The State Hornet

The mood is set: lights are dim, candles are lit and the champagne has been flowing.

You are lying on the bed, waiting for your lover to return when, to your surprise, he or she pulls out some handcuffs. You’re feeling adventurous so you let them lock you in. He or she asks if they can flog you…you have no idea what this means.

BDSM or bondage/discipline, Dominance/submission and sadomasochism/masochism carries a stigma of violence and pain. It’s frowned upon in mainstream society although most people don’t realize they are already interested in it.

The use of handcuffs or blindfolds – even spanking - is a form of BDSM and is commonly accepted as rough sex. According to the 2005 Durex Global Sex Survey, 22 percent of people admitted to using handcuffs or blindfolds during sex. Nineteen percent liked spanking during sex, also known as flogging. The survery involved 317,000 people in 41 countries. Twenty percent of people have used some kind of bondage utility and five percent identify as being involved in the BDSM community.

Dungeon owner Brittany Delta said the biggest misconception about BDSM is that it’s serious.

“People think there’s no humor in it - they are dead wrong,” Delta said, “It’s whips and chains, yes, but it turns to wrestling and Stone Cold Steve Austin head locks. It’s lots of fun.”

People assume those who are into BDSM must have a psychological issue and desire to inflict pain onto another person. Charles Moser found, via survey, “There is no evidence at all supporting the theory of BDSM practitioners having any special psychiatric problems or even problems based solely on their preferences.”

Researchers presented data in 2007 to the World Congress of Sexology which showed that “BDSM is simply a sexual interest attractive to a minority, not a pathological symptom of past abuse or difficulty with normal sex.” Although some members of the BDSM community joke that they all have problems that brought them here.

Delta said she’s learned to accept others for who they are through owning a dungeon. ...

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