NCSF on Twitter   Subscribe to the NCSF RSS Feed   NCSF Blog

International News: "When domination rules the bedroom"

on Friday, 29 June 2012. Posted in Front Page Headline, Media Updates

Local group Kingston Kinksters is a social and educational outlet for people interested in BDSM

Queens University Journal

Soft-spoken and well-mannered, the voice on the other end of the phone isn’t what people typically see as someone who enjoys BDSM — a practice that encompasses bondage, discipline, domination, submission, sadism and masochism.

I’m speaking with Gaelach, a single mother in her 40s. She has a nine-to-five job and, now that the summer weather is here, regularly attends barbecues with family and friends.

Gaelach is her “scene name” — an alias used by those who wish to protect their identity for what’s often still seen as a sexual taboo.

Gaelach and her partner Renshu regularly engage in BDSM in the bedroom.

“We met through friends who were also into BDSM,” Gaelach said. It was a friend that first introduced her to the BDSM community.

“That person had recognized in conversation … things I had said about the way I thought [and] the way I felt about things,” she said. “[They] recognized that I was a person who might be on a different side of things, and who kind of exposed me to the community very gently.”

Gaelach and Renshu are part of the Kingston Kinksters, a group of people with similar alternative sexual interests.

The umbrella term of BDSM covers a wide variety of activities. It can range from restraints and blindfolds to psychologically humiliating actions — like using degrading comments in bed. The common factor here is that use of these consensual actions end in sexual arousal.

The Kingston Kinksters provide social and emotional support for people interested in BDSM. The group was started in early 2011 and now has upwards of 250 people involved, including some Queen’s students.

“They provide a lot of education and activism and fundraising in the local community so that people who practice alternative sexuality aren’t persecuted because of their forms of expression,” she said.

Outside of these communities, Gaelach has faced the cold shoulder from her peers.

“I personally have experienced some difficulty because of my choices [from] people who have found out just through conversation … or they suspect something,” she said. “Not everyone takes it well.” ...

Social Bookmarks

Comments (0)

Leave a comment

You are commenting as guest. Optional login below.

Cancel Submitting comment...

Latest Reader Comments

  • I just wonder in this day of supposed enlightenment and supposed understanding when people will realize that same-sex marriages and...

    M.Wryter

    28. May, 2015 |

  • Men & women then were on an equal footing as survival of the group dictated such. Males hunted and females tended the tribe and needs of...

    M.Wryter

    28. May, 2015 |

  • The male & female species are driven sexually by age old human wants and needs. Not that females should be violated just cuz they are...

    M.Wryter

    28. May, 2015 |

  • Good to see and yes they are very normal people, total kudos to them for doing this, such progressive thinkers and doers...........winks

    M.Wryter

    28. May, 2015 |

  • It's time to push back even harder against religious bigotry and discrimination. Our case in federal court is the first case that will...

    Elle

    27. May, 2015 |

  • As is true with ANY group of human beings, there will always be individuals who take advantage of a given situation. However,...

    Mistress Black Diamond

    30. April, 2015 |