VICE
By Alison Segal
I walk into a restaurant in Downtown Los Angeles. It’s Friday night, and I’m late because the parking lots around here only take cash, and obviously no one carries that anymore. But after a traversing the streets, desperately hunting for an ATM, I’ve finally made it to the Dominatrices Against Donald Trump! Presidential Party and Fundraiser, hosted by Mistress Tara Indiana, head dominatrix and founder of the BDSM playpen Den of Iniquity. I’m here because Mistress Tara is running for president. …
…VICE: Why did you decide to get involved in this election?
Mistress Tara: I wanted to bring attention to how utterly broken our political system is. What is both glorious and tragic about this election cycle is how clearly it illustrates a core principle of our country – that anyone, and I do mean anyone, can run for president. Whether that be a washed up reality-TV star, a person being investigated by the FBI, or a dominatrix. Really, of all these choices, you have to ask yourself, “Which is the most ridiculous?”
Is there a correlation between BDSM and politics? There are probably similar fundamental principles: power, control, understanding the needs of people?
There is a correlation on several levels. The obvious one is, as Oscar Wilde said, “Everything is about sex, except sex; sex is about power”—and nowhere [is that] truer then in S&M. But on a deeper level, I’ve noticed being in the scene for more than 25 years, that fetishes and kinks come in trends, just like fashion, music, etc. And these trends tend to be reactions to the social and political zeitgeist.
For example, when I got into the business in 1989, your garden-variety slave was into foot worship and cross-dressing. I see this as a reaction to changing gender roles and a need to work though those issues. Then when AIDS started to affect the straight community, things like heavy medical, blood sports, and scat became popular. People were tired of “safe sex”—they wanted to do things that were dangerous and risky. They were tired of having to suit up in a latex body-condom to be intimate with another human being. And now chastity is really popular. I think it’s because sex is more readily available to men then ever, so they are fetishizing not having sex.
Can you describe what’s in your campaign platform?
The problem with this country—and indeed the world—is there are not enough women in leadership positions. Men have been in charge for the last 6,000 years, and they’ve really fouled it up. It’s time for a woman to be in charge. My platform is based on this foundation.
The first thing I’m going do after I’m sworn in is to decriminalize all consensual sex acts between adults. I will prohibit white men from holding office without permission from their Mistress. And then I’m going to institute a sexier enhanced interrogation program lead by leather-clad dominatrices incorporating teasing and denial methods to break ISIS operatives. We also need funding for scientific research into BDSM. I believe it’s genetic, and it’s time to settle the nature vs. nurture question. Finally, I will require men to carry purses and be fully responsible for their own keys and wallets.
How did you think of your slogan?
Oh, that was easy. It wrote itself. If Donald Trump was going to “Make America Great Again,” then I was going to “Whip It Back into Shape.” Beating middle-aged white men is my most well-developed skill set. That’s what I’ve been doing for the past 25 years—and I do it well.
Who are your supporters?
Well, they say politics make strange bedfellows, and I’m no exception. I’m going to carry the millennial vote, especially hipsters that will vote for me ironically, as well as disgruntled Bernie supporters. I’ll also run well with moderate Republicans who can’t bring themselves to vote for Trump or Hillary. I’ll likely get all of those votes. I’m also polling well in the black community, lesbian community, and of course, the kink community. [Author’s note: As far as I can tell, this is unsubstantiated. Mistress Tara has not been included in any reliable polls.]
Do you think you’re the most authentic candidate? All of your cards are kind of out on the table.
Without a doubt. My skeletons are all out of the closet. I’m an open book ,and my positions have been consistent through out my career. I say what I mean, and I mean what I say. You always know where Mistress Tara stands on any issue. Especially when she’s referring to herself in the third person.
Talk to me about Donald Trump. You’ve had some pretty harsh things to say about him.
I think he’s a needle-dicked carnival barker whose every thought and deed is [meant] to compensate for the size of his incredibly tiny micro penis. I mean, really, building giant gold plated skyscraper with your name on it? If that’s not overcompensating for some deeply ingrained inadequacy, I don’t know what is. Even his choice of words, “huge,” “tremendous,” “big”—it’s laughable. He wears his ties long, as if to cover his shame. The bragging, all of that, are all obvious symptoms of small-penis syndrome. …