Metro UK
by Rebecca Reid
Valentine’s day is fast approaching, meaning that the world is about to be filled with overpriced roses and love.
But what if v-day isn’t about dinner with the one you love. What if you could fill a dinner party with the people you’re involved with?
It’s easy to assume that relationship means two people, but in fact, that’s just not true. Relationships can include just as many people as you like (a bit like families).And when it does, it’s called polyamory, or an open relationship, or ethical non-monogamy.
So what is polyamory all about? Take a seat, sharpen your pencils and get comfortable. Welcome to polyamory 101.
What is polyamory?
Polyamory is (putting it simply) the practice of having relationships with more than one person at a time.Polyamory is often confused with or used as an interchangeable expression for ethical non-monogamy or an open relationship.
Being poly tends to mean forming relationships to people, rather than just sleeping with them, whereas ethical non-monogamous relationships tend to focus on having sex with other people rather than relationships with them.
What qualifies you to talk about it?
I was in a poly relationship for just shy of five years and no-one killed anyone (though some extremely passive aggressive texts were sent).
How does it work?
Explaining how any relationship works is tricky, but the main focus of polyamory is that it’s a relationship with more than two people in it.
It can work in all different combinations. Sometimes all the people in the poly are romantically involved with each other, sometimes they’re only involved with a few. Sometimes there’s no connect at all between some members of the group.
The only universal principle of polyamory is that it’s an honest and transparent relationship. Unlike an affair, everyone is acutely aware of what’s happening, and there’s no deception.
So you can sleep with anyone you want?
Sometimes, but not always. In some poly relationships, it’s perfectly legit to sleep with whoever you want. In others, it needs to be cleared first, and some poly relationships are monogamous within themselves. …