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How to Create an Open Environment for Talking About Sex


“I mean, the very first question someone asked one day was, ‘How do I introduce BDSM into my sex life?’ ” he says, “and I raised my hand like, ‘Hey, I have a question for all of you: What is BDSM?’ And so they tell me what it is—essentially Fifty Shades of Grey, right?—and we start talking about it, and people are sort of passively saying, ‘Well, you know, it’s when you engage in sort of fantasy play and you use whips and chains,’ and all these things, and I was sitting there just like, ‘Wow, I have the most boring sex life.’ I had no idea that we could use sex as a prism to look at things like safety and trust and self-respect and creativity and our childhood and our relationship to our friends and our parents and the world around us. I was just like, ‘That’s unbelievable.’ ”