Your Rights. Your Privacy. Your Freedom.
 

Media Update – June 3, 2004

   1. Board of Regents next to receive Cuffs appeal

   2. Berkeley religious center flies rainbow flag

   3. Fantasies are fine, but be careful about acting on them

   4. We've been here all along: Demystifying the power games of BDSM

   1. Board of Regents next to receive Cuffs appeal

   2. Berkeley religious center flies rainbow flag

   3. Fantasies are fine, but be careful about acting on them

   4. We've been here all along: Demystifying the power games of BDSM

 

Board of Regents next to receive Cuffs appeal

 

by Morris L. Manning

Iowa State Daily

June 1, 2004

 

After exhausting all its options at the university level, the student group Cuffs is now preparing an appeal to the Board of Regents.

 

The bondage and sadomasochism group was found guilty of assault earlier this year by Director of Judicial Affairs Bethany Schuttinga. The verdict was the result of BDSM demonstrations at the group's meetings that Iowa State determined violated university rules and Iowa law.

 

For its Board of Regents appeal, Cuffs must present a written presentation to ISU President Gregory Geoffroy, who will add his comments before forwarding the case to the regents.

 

Cuffs President Harlan "Duane" Long Jr. said he expects the process to take a few weeks because of the regents' meeting and hearing schedule. The next two regents meetings are scheduled for June 15-16 in Okoboji and Aug. 3-4 in Sioux City.

 

Susan Wright, founder of the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom, said in an e-mail message the coalition will support Cuffs with fund-raising efforts for legal challenges to the university's decision.

 

[cont.]

 

To read this article, go to:

http://www.iowastatedaily.com/vnews/display.v/ART/2004/06/01/40bbdd0186a37

To respond, write to: letters@iowastatedaily.com or comment at bottom of the article

Berkeley religious center flies rainbow flag

 

by Randy Myers

Contra Costa Times (California)

June 1, 2004

 

The religious studies center Mary Tolbert helped create wears its rainbow stripes proudly, vigorously advocating for gays and lesbians sitting in pews and preaching from pulpits.

 

"Our role is really to work to change the public discourse around sexuality and religion in a way that works for the benefit of the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people," said Tolbert, the center's executive director.

 

It's accomplishing that mission without any fuss at a Christian seminary, an institution where it would be more likely to encounter the most icy reception.

 

Misuse of scripture in the debate, especially about same-sex marriage, most distressed her, Tolbert said.

 

"I've heard people say the Bible is for marriage and I just wonder what Bible are they reading? Because the Bible I read doesn't have much to do with marriage between one man and one woman. And in the Hebrew Bible in the Old Testament, one of the predominant patterns of marriage is polygamy."

 

[cont.]

 

To read this article, go to:

http://www.contracostatimes.com/mld/cctimes/news/8808190.htm?1c

To respond, write to: the author at rmyers@cctimes.com or the editors at letters@cctimes.com

Fantasies are fine, but be careful about acting on them

 

by Laura Berman

Chicago Sun-Times

May 31, 2004

 

Among different cultural groups and across the sexes, the types of fantasies experienced are quite varied. The most commonly reported male fantasy is a "menage a trois," a sexual encounter between one man and two women. It makes anthropological sense in a way, in that the males who have survived throughout evolution have been those who spread their genes as far and wide as possible, thus the more the merrier. The most common female fantasy involves sexual submission, where she is ravaged or tied up. Milder versions of the fantasy include a student with a professor or a prisoner with a cop; ultimately the control is taken away from her. I think the explanation may lie in the fact that most women in our culture still don't feel as sexually entitled as they could. This is not to say that women want to be raped in real life. It's simply that most women are still not completely comfortable initiating sex and giving up the control can make her feel less responsible for her sexual impulses.

 

In general, bondage and domination and sadomasochistic fantasies are quite common, as are voyeuristic and exhibitionistic fantasies, where you are watching others or being watched while engaging in sexual activity.

 

When it comes to bringing another person in, beware. You need to be prepared for the potential after effects of jealousy or feelings of betrayal and mistrust, even if both of you agreed. Sometimes the fantasy just feels too risky for one of the partners; whether it's sex in a public place or some extreme sado-masochistic or bondage and domination fantasy. I counsel couples struggling with this to negotiate with each other. Maybe there is another fantasy that is less intense or scary that the resistant partner can offer to enact. Ultimately, in order for the couple to be successful at making a fantasy a reality, they both need to be on the same page, be clear on the expectations and potential ramifications, and feel invested in the process. Forcing or pushing a partner into it rarely works and often results in damage to the relationship.

 

[cont.]

 

To read this opinion article, go to:

http://www.suntimes.com/output/berman/cst-ftr-berman31.html

To respond, write to: the author at drberman@suntimes.com or the editors at letters@suntimes.com

We've Been here all along:

 

Demystifying the power games of BDSM

by Paul F. P. Pogue

Nuvo.net (Indiana)

May 28, 2004

 

"Check him out," Mistress Moth said to Maitresse Miss Ann, pointing over to the bar at Nicky Blaine's. Both dominas – they don't like the term "dominatrix" – were there for the "Meeting the Mistress" night Moth holds the third Thursday of every month at Nicky Blaine's. "He's been glancing our way every few minutes. I'd bet you anything he's here to see us."

 

Sure enough, once they lured him over, it turned out he was there to see them. He couldn't have seemed more different from those already present, with his button-up shirt, sensibly cut hair, even a pocket protector – as compared to Moth decked out in full glam garb and black latex. And yet they are not so different. In a moment the mundane reached out to the extreme, and the extreme reached back.

 

BDSM, fetish, spanking, whatever you call it. BDSM is the accepted term among most practitioners, reflecting its threefold nature: bondage/ discipline, dominance/submission, sadism/masochism. In those three mirror images you find all aspects of fetish, from people interested in being tied up and spanked to those who fixate on specific body parts to more extreme interests.

 

[cont.]

 

To read this article, go to: http://www.nuvo.net/archive/2004/05/26/weve_been_here_all_along.html To respond, write to: the author at ppouge@nuvo.net or comment at bottom of the article

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