Groundbreaking new research challenges stereotypes about BDSM participants.
Psychology Today
by Michael Aaron, Ph.D.
First, a caveat: We are not advocates of the ill-informed works of Sigmund Freud or E. L. James, author of the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy, nor do we consider them authorities on sex and sexuality. However, it would be foolish to deny the impact they have had on society. Freud, although his theories and therapy were rooted in misogyny and opinion, did something no other psychological professional in the Western world had done before him—he openly talked about sex and sexual identity development. This laid the groundwork for our current sexual world and profession, one where we can now talk about sex, and where we have space to assist clients in working through their sexuality-related concerns.
Author E. L. James, has done something similar for the world of Bondage and Domination/Dominance and Submission/Sadism and Masochism/Sadomasochism (BDSM), or kink—she has opened up a larger discussion around these practices and erotic orientation. This is arguably the one positive outcome of James’ books and the related movie series. These questions and conversations around BDSM are much needed and long overdue. So for this outcome, much like that of Freud’s enabling talking about sexuality in general, we are thankful.
To the point of our caveat: Freud did not base his ideas on research-informed knowledge, leading to harm and misunderstanding by many consumers of his works, and neither did E. L. James, leading many of her readers to have grave misunderstandings of what BDSM is and is not. While misconceptions about BDSM are not new, some of the most frequently asked questions include: What kinds of personality types engage in BDSM? Do people who engage in BDSM come from abusive families? Why would someone want to engage in BDSM play? Is BDSM abuse? Are BDSM relationships cold, distant, controlling, or abusive? What kind of feelings do people who engage in BDSM experience before, during, and after intense sensation play?
So, in order to help elevate greater understanding and provide answers to these questions, we conducted an ethics board approved study involving over 200 participants who engage in BDSM. We recruited subjects via online networks and professional listservs. Information was obtained from respondents via an online survey, consisting of roughly 12 qualitative questions about the individual’s motivations and experiences engaging in BDSM, as well as three psychological instruments: the Experiences in Close Relationships Scale-Short Form (ECR-S), which measures attachment style; Adverse Childhood Experiences Scale (ACE), which measures level of childhood trauma; and The Big Five Inventory (BFI), which measures personality traits. Using these measures, we were able to answer many of the above questions. Our preliminary findings are below. We are currently writing up these findings and will be sending them to appropriate journals for publication.
Why would someone want to engage in BDSM play? What kind of feelings do people who engage in BDSM experience before, during, and after their intense sensation play?
The qualitative section asked about the individual’s motivation, as well as subjective experiences before, during, and after engaging in BDSM sensation play. In response to these kinds of questions, many BDSM participants stated that they felt excitement and anticipation ahead of time, a sense of excitement and pleasure during the encounter, and a wave of deep connection to their partner afterward, as well as a stronger sense of self-empowerment and authenticity.
Do people who engage in BDSM come from abusive childhoods or unhealthy families?
Regarding the ACE assessment, we found no significant correlation between people who engage in BDSM and reports of being touched/groped/molested as a child by someone 5 or more years older. The BDSM participants also showed no correlation with a variety of negative factors, such as feeling unloved, not having enough to eat, separated or divorced parents, or mental health or substance abuses issues in the home.
What kind of personality types engage in BDSM?
Regarding the BFI measure, we found a significant correlation between BDSM and Openness to New Experiences. Otherwise, this group was considered ‘typical’ in terms of the standard/normal sample on which the BFI was developed. …