Your Tango
by Miko Technogeisha
Whether you’re poly or just want to give them a view of a bigger world.
There are many of you who, like me, are trying to raise children in a society that often is not particularly accepting.
Society, books, and movies haven’t exactly paved the way to widespread acceptance of the notion of ethical non-monogamy.
In the case of my own relationship, we may have opened up our marriage late in the game, but we’d always been open-minded about sexuality and gender roles, and we’ve been trying to keep the standard, narrative-driven drivel to a minimum since the birth of our first child.
It was easier in the early years, and then the real challenge began in preschool.
The other little girls had been fed a non-stop diet of “Someday my prince will come,” which our daughter decided to embrace wholeheartedly. Then a couple of years later a similar thing happened to our son.
Once they entered school, gender roles were assigned and adhered to. So was the notion of dyadic relationships, with the inevitable, “First comes love, then comes marriage, the comes the baby in the baby carriage.”
I didn’t feel it would be enough to tell them this wasn’t the only option in life. I needed backup. I needed to come up with resources that go against the standard narrative and offer positive views on non-traditional families and relationships. It was difficult, but I did find a few solid alternatives.
Trying to find books, TV shows or even movies with non-traditional families was not as easy as I had hoped.
Most are geared toward LGBT families — not polyamorous families, and certainly not families with parents who swing. They are still a good way to start as a way to introduce the concept of non-traditional families and to celebrate our unique differences.
Books like The Family Book and It’s Okay to be Different by Todd Parr offer basic examples, as does ABC: A Family Alphabet Book and 123: A Family County Book by Bobbie Combs.
And Tango Makes Three by Justin Richardson and Peter Parnell, Mini Mia and her Darling Uncle by Pija Lindenbaum, Daddy’s Roommate and Daddy’s Wedding by Michael Willhoite, along with Heather Has Two Mommies and Mommy, Mama and Me by Leslea Newman are all great books specifically about life with gay and lesbian parents. …