by Seq and Caramel, NCSF Board Members
Violence is a pervasive issue in our society, and it affects everyone in some way or another. While we often think of violence as something that happens between two people, the truth is that it is often witnessed by others. Bystander intervention is a prevention strategy that recognizes the important role that bystanders play in preventing violence.
The goal of bystander prevention strategies is to change social norms that accept violence and empower individuals to intervene in potentially harmful situations safely. By intervening, bystanders can help prevent harm from occurring and send a clear message that violence is not acceptable.
Bystander intervention can take many forms, from speaking up when you witness inappropriate behavior to physically intervening in a dangerous situation. The most effective interventions are those that are safe, respectful, and appropriate to the situation. Bystander intervention is not about being a hero or putting yourself in harm’s way; it is about taking action when you see something that is not right.
While alternative sexual communities can provide a supportive and affirming space for individuals to explore their sexuality, it is important to note that they are not immune to issues of abuse or exploitation. It is crucial that these communities have mechanisms in place to address instances of misconduct and ensure the safety and well-being of their members.
Helping behavior depends on individual traits such as knowledge, confidence, and social responsibility, situational factors like the severity of need and number of bystanders, and victim characteristics like appearance, friendship, and perceived deservedness. Studies reveal that people tend to offer help 80% of the time when alone but only 20% in the presence of others. However, helping behavior involves multiple decisions, not just one.
People may not help due to distractions, fear of danger, or concerns about making the situation worse. To address this, one can consider the best intervention strategy, report to staff or group organizers, be mindful of surroundings, anticipate problems, ask others for input, and be prepared to resist peer pressure. Victims can also let someone know they need help.
When is it not appropriate to intervene? Here are some instances:
- when people are in the middle of a scene at a party,
- when interrupting might increase the level of danger,
- when we do not have enough information to proceed safely.
There are also various reasons why people don’t help. For instance:
- they may not have enough skills to intervene,
- they may be concerned about retaliation, or
- they may not want to embarrass themselves.
One crucial factor that affects people’s decision to help is their ability to take the perspective of the victim. Perspective taking refers to the ability to identify with another person’s feelings, thoughts, and beliefs. When we take someone else’s perspective, we try to imagine how they think and feel, or imagine being in the same situation as them.
However, it’s essential to recognize that someone’s feelings may not be the same as our own. Our perceptions can be influenced by our experiences, biases, and values, and we need to be aware of that. So, when assessing a situation and deciding whether to intervene, we should take into account the victim’s perspective and try to understand their feelings and needs.
By practicing perspective taking, we can develop empathy and compassion towards others, which can help us become more effective helpers. Additionally, we need to assess the situation carefully, develop appropriate skills and strategies, and consider our emotional arousal level before taking action. When we intervene, we should aim to ensure the safety of everyone involved and maintain mutual respect and mutual purpose.
Current play party etiquette dictates that only dungeon monitors (DMs) or event hosts can interrupt scenes when an apparent consent violation occurs. It is important to respect this etiquette and let the DMs or hosts handle the situation. However, if you notice a problem that does not involve consent violation, there are strategies you can use to intervene safely and effectively.